Other people? Worry not! Fear not!

We all live in some form of communities, big and small, among people. Therefore, we have no ways of avoiding people. Everyday we’re surrounded by them, at home with family, at work with colleages, at social events with friends, or on streets with strangers. As such, we hear things people say and observe how people act AND pertaining to this post’s topic – we hear things people say about us, see how people react to us, and what images they have for us.

The problem arises when we get so caught up in them and become affected. We start to worry what other people have to say about us. We live in constant worry and fear others having negative opinions and thoughts on us. We are afraid they see and label us as freaks, weirdos, geeks, clowns, jerks, or whatever social cliche out there. As this trend starts its engine in us, it escalates as we meet more people and the worry and fear keep on increasing.

Consequently, we fear to do many things and our productivity decreases, inhibited by our fear. Sometimes we even give up on striving to improve ourselves, which could make us different from the majority leading to labels and criticism. That leads me to the quote, “The greatest fear in life is fear itself.”

If we constantly worry and fear and do nothing because of that, we will always remain in the same place! If we cannot understand that and move on, we will make no progression in relationship, career, or life. Worry and fear become our greatest road blocks. It is about the realization that worrying and fear will not change reality for us, which begs the question, why the heck are we doing it? Until we can identify them, face them, and conquer them with awareness and rationalization, we will forever be bogged down.

We do not make decisions on what words come out of other people’s mouths or what they think. Consequently, we should not worry so much about what others have to say or think about us because we cannot change other people. Everyday we make decisions with the goal to make things better for ourselves and the people we care about. So rather, the decision is to change and imporove ourselves in turn, creates a character in us that will provide strong influence in the people around us, but that is not the main concern. The main concern is yourself, and the influence is just a result. Chaning other people is not the concern because that will never be guaranteed because people could simply have different experience and perspectives or they may just be jealous, and that’s too bad. That is not the concern. You have made the best decision you can to change and focus on yourself. As Jet Li said, “Do your best, it’s good enough.”

Make decisions with self in mind. And by “self,” I mean a person’s own well-being, values, and priorities that he holds true to. Stop your worry and fear due to other people! When you get yourself straight, other things will slowly become as a result.

Originally posted 2007-03-12 23:07:22. Republished by Blog Post Promoter

In praise of idleness

I keep seeing the occasional spike in the article that I had written awhile back – The Art of Doing Nothing so I feel like to add a few thoughts to that.

Productivity seems to have become the end-all-be-all goal in our current time. Driving up productivity is an unquestionable aspect in driving more values in business, at all cost.

The attitude from such execution results in the mentality that we have to be useful, productive ALWAYS into all aspects of our lives. Thus…

To be doing something useful is great!
To be idling is blasphemy!

I know we don’t really say things like that but when anyone says that he had done nothing over the weekend or something, he’s usually met with the reaction “oh… (maybe you should be doing something more useful, or be out doing something exciting).” Well, something along those line. In short, the reaction to an “idling answer” is always kind of awkward.

I find there is a lot be praised to be able to be idle — and that includes our physical and mental capacities. To be honest, we need to be able to be idle. Not always, but I think it’s necessary on intervals.

There is something rejuvenating about it.
A lot of creativity arises from moments of idleness.
Epiphany usually only happen when you can stop to be idle.
If we ignore all the above, we simply need a balance in life.

Idleness is the couter-balance of productivity.

Slightly different version of being idle is to be able to move/act at leisure.

But I think in our pursuit of growth and mostly only economically… sometimes also for fame and power, we give up this important concept. And we almost chastise each other for being anything other than productive.

I read something awhile back that I’ll always remember… You know what kind of people would not be hostile and try to always fight with others? People who can stop to look at and genuinely enjoy a beautiful scenery.

I enjoy being able to be idle and leisurely.

Maybe we need more people like that. Maybe we need to start teaching that.

I feel the reason behind our distaste against idleness has to do with our deep desire to control. We want things to happen our way instead of letting things happen by itself when in things, many things happen outside of our control. Sad to say, that is more healthy to let things take its course. To always control is a very short sighted perception due to insecurity.

It is also a fact that our brain does MUCH more than we are consciously aware of. Thus when we feel sleep/rest is wasteful, that is also completely wrong. Think of it as a digesting process when we let ourselves rest… of all the events that happen during the day, the stress, the hormone, and all the emotional wear and tear that occurred during everyday!

Originally posted 2012-09-26 22:28:39. Republished by Blog Post Promoter

Time and Man

Man created time, and then let time mastered him.
– Kin

Originally posted 2011-02-23 23:47:56. Republished by Blog Post Promoter

Housing Slump Saga Continues

On the topic of buying my own place, it has always been my thought to wait until half way through next year to make a decision on buying. This MSN Money article, House prices expected to fall until 2009, reaffirms it for me.

“It’s going to be a long time before we see it bottom out and recover,” said David Lowman, chief executive of JPMorgan Chase’s Global Mortgage unit. “There’s too much inventory already in the marketplace.”

Lowman and the three other participants in a round-table session before most of the convention’s 4,000 participants differed slightly on the size of price declines still upcoming, but they agreed no price recovery is likely until at least 2009.

“I think this year we will see a 2% decline in national home prices, and we’re projecting about a 4% decline next year,” said Thomas Lund, an executive vice president at Fannie Mae.

Prices likely will flatten in 2009, Lund said, before gradually rising.

Lowman said it might be 2010 before the price decline ends.

This is not hard to imagine, because it is only since last year 2006 that the rate has begun to reset for many home buyers with ARM. Those ARMs are borrowed on a fixed rate for either 3-year or 5-year for many people spreaded over time. Hence, it is not difficult to imagine that as many more of those ARMs’ rates get reset in the coming years, there will be more defaults and foreclosures following. Together with an already over-supplied market, housing price is bound to drop further

So honestly speaking, who knows when the housing market is going to bottom out? Nonetheless, that is my vision and what I believe. That is the reason why I am waiting until next year to get a better perspective before making a decision to jump into home-ownership.

There is no hurry because while I wait,I will continue to put my money to work in some high-yield saving accounts and stocks/funds investment.

Originally posted 2007-10-27 13:08:41. Republished by Blog Post Promoter

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