Thanksgiving is just around the corner. So let me take the chance to touch on the subject of giving today.

People always say “giving is receiving”, “it’s better to give than to receive”, “to give is to receive”. But why? Don’t you hate it when people say it, and you just have to agree, even though it may not make too much sense to you. You don’t understand why, but you have to nod your head anyways. Well, I hate that, and seriously, I don’t know if it makes sense to them when they said it either. Perhaps they say it… just to say it. So annoying. So despicable. So stupid. I’m just kidding.

Now following, I will share what I think about “giving” and how exactly is “to give is to receive”.

First, I declare that a prerequisite to achieve the concept of “to give is to receive”. The prerequisite is the ability to accept complete responsibility for your own action.

All of you out there, all of us, the entirety of human beings need to come to the realization that of accepting full responsibility of actions and so, whatever you do is your own choice and you must be responsible for the consequences. Now translating that, every time you give, it needs to be a direct result of your choice and your choice only, not because of obligation, not because of guilt, not because of expected return, etc.

By making your own decision to give, you can reap the full benefits of giving. You give because you are free and able to do so. You give because you have compassion for your fellow human beings, be it family, friends, or complete strangers whom you give to. You can then feel fully satisfied of yourself because you made your own choice to give, to help others, and that sense of satisfaction and joy is NOT a selfish result. You are giving because you WANT to.

Selfish is what? Selfish is when you give to expect to be given in return. How often you see people around you who give love and expect love in return, and how many of those are healthy relationships? You give because you love that person and if that person loves you in return, that’s great. If they don’t, it’s unfortunate, but if you continue to give to further expect something in return, that is not only selfish, it is also a self-destructing behavior. This is why people who truly love are the independent ones who are capable to make each choice in their life while accepting full responsibility for their own actions.

Nor shall you give as a result of guilt or obligation because that will also lead to similar result, where you feel that you have been taken advantage of, or that the other person owes you. That will become burden, which can easily cause you to feel like a victim in the future.

“I help him this time, he should help me in return next time I ask for favor.” We probably have all thought that. We’re only humans. Well… don’t. Stop it. You helped your friend because you chose to and that you will be happy to have done it. That’s receiving right there.

It is okay to accept gift, free meal, or help later if the other person chooses to do so in return. Just don’t expect so, or you are setting yourself up for disappointment, and disappointment is definitely not a form of “receiving”.

In short, to give to rececive, you must make your own decision to give.

Give to be helpful for others.
Give base on a sense of genuine gratitude. (Thanksgiving!)
Give because of compassion.
Give because you want and choose to.

Or 5 million dollars, or 10 million dollars… It doesn’t really matter. The point is, let’s assume you receive a certain amount of money that provides you financial independence for the rest of your life.

What would you do?

First, why don’t you take a look at today’s market. See how far it’s plunged. 360 points! Everyone who has 401k and stock portfolio can probably feel it, ouch! For those of us looking at long term, it maybe less relevant, but nonetheless, my net worth is taking the hit temporarily.

The reason I mentioned that… Sometimes I feel this uncontrolled impatience inside myself. I’ll look at the amount in my saving, in brokerage, and then the amount of my loan. I look at my net worth, and I feel that it’s just not growing fast enough. I save, I invest, I contribute to 401k with discipline each month, but it’s still not growing fast enough for my patience. I want to be financially independent today. I want to be done. I want to be out of the rat race right now. And honestly? Don’t we all.

Though, I brought myself back to reality, back to my calm self and without losing sight. I think about what I would do if I do receive the money that enables my financial independence, be it 1mil, 5mil, 10mil, or 1bil…

Now I have hobbies, and quite a few of them. I have things I like doing. I want to help people. But as far as what exactly I want to do with the freedom and all those time that comes with the financial independence, I cannot say I am 100% certain, which is okay because I need go through what I am going through. The experience will continuously let me better understand the world around me and learn about myself. Only with such experience, I am what I am today and what I will be. And also more appreciative I shall be when the moment arrives. That’s why, I am and will continue to do my best, and there is no hurry. Enjoying and being in each moment, including this process, is important. There is no better place and moment to be.

As the saying goes (vaguely as I can remember it):
Every moment you spent wishing to be somewhere else is a moment of your life wasted.

What are we?
Humans.

What’s the most significant between us and other animals?
We have a mind that allows thorough thought process before we take actions.

Right… if a person take a real close look at the society today, one would wonder if that is necessarily true…
Sadly.

Of course…
Critical thinking is tough.
People don’t like tough.
Thinking requires actual work.
People don’t want to work.
Thinking is boring.
People don’t want to be bored.

It’s so much easier to not think and be told what to do, or just go with the flow.
You can always blame the outside when something doesn’t go well.
No responsibility. No strings attached.
What convenience.
Let’s all give it up!
The mind that is.

But there is a slight problem if you take a look…

Looking at the advertising sector, you can observe the rampant, or shall I said rabid, movement and expansion these days. Remember I talked about why there’s no need for financially aware consumers before? Together with that, another idea that actually encourage the ads companies to continue their push to reach into every corner of consumers’ life is because how little people give thoughts about what they consume.

How are the growth of the ads sector and whether people think related, you may ask? If people don’t give so much thoughts into what products they are buying, what kind of loans they are borrowing, what kind of service they are affording, they are more bound, more easily succumbed to spend money on products they don’t really need, loans that cost them more in the long run, or services that bring little to no significant values. That in turn, allows all the ads campaigns to have such an effectiveness that promotes more use of ads. “It works, why not do it more!” Consumers are letting themselves be told what they “need” when most of the things being marketed are just things they “want”.

Take a look at Apple…
Take a look at all weight-loss programs…
Take a look at all the new drugs coming out…

In addition, if we look at the current society, how many people are not too hesitant to make their voice be heard? But quite often, they are just taking sides without clear thinking or they are simply echoing off each other. They said things but they didn’t say things because there are no substance, no real thinking behind those words. My sincere opinion is that they would not be saying many of those words if they truly see the world and the things that are happening as they really are.

Moreover…
Stress is on the rise.
Depression is on the rise.
Obesity is on the rise.
Nation’s health is on the decline.

Could it be that the whole population has been soaked by the message of materialism, perpetual growth, and flashy life style for too long? That everyone would work work work, in order to earn earn earn, to have lots of money to afford “things”.
Who needs to exercise.
Who needs to spend time with family.
Who needs to hang out with friends.
Who needs to appreciate nature.
Who needs a spiritual life.

Let me end the thought provoking content here, hopefully they are, despite them being very high level
I would not claim myself an expert in the above subjects, but hopefully I got my points across.
Just here to offer my point of view.

And to sum up it up…
You should do your own thinking.
Do not let other people dictate your actions.
Take your life personally and find the values that are important to you.
Understand them, prioritize them.
Then act and live accordingly.
Finally, use your mind wisely.

On the topic of buying my own place, it has always been my thought to wait until half way through next year to make a decision on buying. This MSN Money article, House prices expected to fall until 2009, reaffirms it for me.

“It’s going to be a long time before we see it bottom out and recover,” said David Lowman, chief executive of JPMorgan Chase’s Global Mortgage unit. “There’s too much inventory already in the marketplace.”

Lowman and the three other participants in a round-table session before most of the convention’s 4,000 participants differed slightly on the size of price declines still upcoming, but they agreed no price recovery is likely until at least 2009.

“I think this year we will see a 2% decline in national home prices, and we’re projecting about a 4% decline next year,” said Thomas Lund, an executive vice president at Fannie Mae.

Prices likely will flatten in 2009, Lund said, before gradually rising.

Lowman said it might be 2010 before the price decline ends.

This is not hard to imagine, because it is only since last year 2006 that the rate has begun to reset for many home buyers with ARM. Those ARMs are borrowed on a fixed rate for either 3-year or 5-year for many people spreaded over time. Hence, it is not difficult to imagine that as many more of those ARMs’ rates get reset in the coming years, there will be more defaults and foreclosures following. Together with an already over-supplied market, housing price is bound to drop further

So honestly speaking, who knows when the housing market is going to bottom out? Nonetheless, that is my vision and what I believe. That is the reason why I am waiting until next year to get a better perspective before making a decision to jump into home-ownership.

There is no hurry because while I wait,I will continue to put my money to work in some high-yield saving accounts and stocks/funds investment.

Follow up on Money Can Buy Happiness, I will talk about two reasons why it is useful to have capital or a good amount of money, business/investment/portfolio-wise. They are also the main reasons the rich can continue to get richer and stay rich, IMHO.

Capital Provides Bargaining Power

Having money gives you bargaining power in dealings. People who have more money usually have or obtain more advantages and benefits in business dealings. How?

Here is the first scenario. Let’s say you are moving a good distance away and have to sell your house. The difference between having the money to buy a new place flat out and not having the money, thus have to wait for the sale of your previous dwelling is huge. If you have the money already, you can buy the new place and wait for a buyer who offer the ideal price for the old house. Otherwise, you maybe forced to accept whatever kind of offer you can get within a short period of time. I know you maybe think, “Oh, I can rent…” but this is just an example. If you insist, then let’s say you have to sell an item. If you are short on cash, you maybe forced to accept a crappy, low-ball offer. Otherwise, you have all the time you have to wait for an ideal offer.

Another scenario is one where you are considering about taking a loan for, let’s say, a mansion, but you actually have A LOT of money and therefore you can pay for it in full with cash. The bank, better than not having your business completely, may tempt you with a loan that has very low interest rate, for which is a good idea to accept so you can put your cash to work elsewhere. Now if you don’t have the money, you must take a loan in order to make the purchase, so why would they need to give you a low interest to lure you to into the loan?

Capital Allows Diversification

Anyone who has done some study into investment would run across the idea of diversification. Briefly, the main concept is that you spread your money out into many areas, and by doing that, you run less of a chance of losing all your money by betting in one place. Meanwhile, you hope that more of the invested areas would do well to allow for profits.

A company with more capital is able to invest in more areas or projects than one with less, and so long as one of those projects becomes a hit, or most of them do well except a few, they’re all set. The same thing applies for individuals. An individual with more capital is able to spread their money into more stocks, funds, and markets, and as long as most investment do above averages, or if one becomes a hit, he’s all set.

Consequently, people with more money have more flexibility in choosing and allocating their investment portfolio. On top of this, there are investment products that are only available to people with certain amount of money.